A Body Makeover
This is a heads-up to those friends who haven't experienced it yet, and
an explanation to those friends and family who have.
My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago. It
was just that quick. I went to sleep in my body and woke up with someone
else's thighs. The new ones had the texture of cooked oatmeal. Who
would have done such a cruel thing to legs that had been mine for years?
Whose thighs were these and what happened to mine?
I spent the entire summer looking for my thighs. Finally, hurt and
angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in jeans and Sheer Energy
pantyhose.
Then, just when my guard was down, the thieves struck again. My butt
was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they took pains to match my
new rear end (although badly attached at least three inches lower than my
original) to the thighs they stuck me with earlier. Now, my rear
complimented my legs, lump for lump. Frantic, I prayed that long
skirts would stay in fashion.
It was two years ago when I realized my arms had been switched. One
morning I was fixing my hair and I watched horrified but fascinated as the
flesh of my upper arms swung to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush.
This was really getting scary. My body was being replaced one section
at a time. How clever and fiendish.
Age? Age had nothing to do with it. Age is supposed to creep
up,unnoticed, something like maturity. NO, I was being attacked
repeatedly and without warning. In despair, I gave up my T-shirts. What could
they do to me next?
My poor neck disappeared more quickly than the Thanksgiving turkey it
now resembled.
That's why I decided to tell my story. I can't take on the medical
profession by myself. Women of the world, wake up and smell the
coffee.
That really isn't plastic that those surgeons are using. You KNOW
where they are getting those replacement parts, don't you?
The next time you suspect someone has had a face "lifted", look again.
Was it lifted from you?
I think I finally found my thighs
and I hope that Cindy Crawford
paid a really good price for them!
This is not a hoax. This is happening to women in every town every
night. WARN YOUR FRIENDS.
P.S. I must say that last year I thought someone had stolen my
breasts. I was lying in bed and they were gone! As I jumped out of bed I was
relieved to see that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I slept.
Now I keep them hidden in my waistband.
(Author: Unknown to Me)
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Copyrighted © September 25, 2005 by Angel45_2B
All rights reserved
SONG TITLE
"The Old Lamplighter"